The other night, I remembered scenes from my favorite movie, The Big Lebowski. I laughed to myself and I started remembering the scene where Maude (Julianne Moore) shows up at the Dude’s (Jeff Bridges) house wanting to have sex. The two have sex and after they’re finished, Maude reveals to Dude that she wanted to have sex in order to get pregnant. Dude is obviously shocked at her statement, but becomes calm after she relays to him that she wants to raise the child on her own. After this scene, Dude confronts a man who has been following him all day and he tells the man that he was just helping his friend conceive. The man is perturbed by the fact that Dude is chill about helping his friend getting pregnant. Dude has a reason to be chill after Maude said that he didn’t have to help her with raising the child. This scene left me pondering on how I or another person would handle this situation. How would I or some other guy handle a girl best friend asking me to help her conceive a child.
I guess this dilemma could be observed by both genders. I’m not a female, so I’m not going to view it from a feminine angle. It will be a masculine angle. Let’s make this scenario similar to the movie. Your girl best friend comes over, wants to mess around, you both do, and after crossing the finish line, she reveals that she is trying to get pregnant. Also, she lets you know that she doesn’t want your involvement in the raising of the child. How do you respond to this? Obviously there’s going to be shock because she wants to get pregnant and then you’re puzzled by the fact that she doesn’t want you to help raise it. What do you do?
There’s two options that I can think of. The first option is to be sympathetic and want a part in raising the child. If you’re going to help make the baby and you feel the need to support it, then you should. This is my route that I’d go, but, preferably, I don’t want a friend that’s like Maude. I don’t want to find out that you’re coming to get down to have a baby when we’re not in love.
The second is to go the route of the Dude. If she says that you don’t have to be involved…well, that’s cool, man. Maude does have a good excuse for her not wanting Dude to be a father. He’s lazy, he has no job, and his only valuable thing is his rug. And maybe a bag of weed somewhere in his house. Some guys would love this situation. All in all, it just depends on what your beliefs are and if you’re adult enough to handle parenthood. I’m not saying that Dude isn’t qualified enough to be a father, but that’s not something he wants to be. He’s too busy finding that fucking rug.